Have you ever wondered why manners are so important?
Well, for one thing, it's because manners preserve relationships.
That's right. When manners are lacking, people may feel violated and
relationships can be threatened.
This is especially true in a marriage relationship. In fact, when
the honeymoon phase of a marriage comes to a close, emotions may begin
to deteriorate if a couple fails to display basic manners toward one
another.
Let me give you several examples. When two people begin dating, they
typically display very good manners, right? They show appreciation by
saying "thank you"; they show consideration by being sensitive and
courteous to each other; the man shows care for the lady by opening
doors for her, and so on.
As the relationship progresses, it is often typical for a husband
and wife to begin to take each other for granted and stop exhibiting
good manners. They may fail to show appreciation by saying "thank you";
they are not as sensitive or courteous to one another; a husband may
stop opening doors for his wife, and so on.
Manners, however, are very important--they are indicators of the
kind of people we are. The presence of manners means that we are
givers. The lack of manners means that we are takers. The presence of
manners means that we are not self-centered. The absence of manners
shows that we are selfish. The presence of manners means that we value
others. The absence of manners means that we don't.
Remember: manners preserve relationships. They preserve a marriage and promote good will between a husband and wife.
God's design is for marriage to get progressively better every year.
It is never His intention for a marriage to experience an emotional
slump for any significant period of time. A lack of passion and good
will between married people indicate that something is missing in the
relationship--primarily good manners.
So, how are your manners? Do you treat your spouse as you did when
you first met? Do you treat strangers better than your spouse? An
honest assessment of your marriage manners can help you discover a lot
about yourself and the overall health of your marriage relationship.
Blessings!
Jimmy Evans
